Saturday, November 29, 2008


Under what circumstances, if any, is it acceptable to threaten a member of your own family with physical violence?

Saturday, November 22, 2008

Word to the wise....

As those of you that follow my blog know, I have suffered a great many indignities, at the hands of my co-workers. Well, as Popeye so eloquently put it, "I have had all I can stand and I can't stands no more." That pretty well sums up my attitude, at the hands of these indignities. And, it is with that frame of mind that my story begins.

Let's just say, that I was entering the restroom with a little intestinal yoga in mind. As luck would have it (enter sarcasm), I was joined by a co-worker who appeared to have the same thing in mind. I entered my stall and he entered his own and that's when things got ugly! I am quite confident, in stating that he barely had time to get his pants down before the fireworks started. Although, these fireworks didn't have that dry, crisp sound that we are accustomed to. On the contrary, these fireworks sounded wet and juicy, but I digress. Once again, I have fallen victim to the barbaric behavior, that has become so common, in men's public restrooms. Especially, the restrooms that are located within the walls of my current employ. Let me just say, either the men up here have some of the worst dietary habits on the planet or they have the most sensitive stomachs in America. Anyway, I am incensed by this needless assault and I will stand for it no more. I immediately answer his shot, with a shot of my own. Have I fallen in to the trap of lowering myself to their level? Yes. Am I feeling pretty proud of myself? ABSOLUTELY! But, in less than the time it took me to type absolutely, my pride had disappeared. Replaced by the familiar stench of failure. You see, I thought I was firing with a full clip. As it turns out, I had but one round in the chamber. In essence, the fight was over before it even began. For, as soon as I had fired my solitary round, he came right back over the top of me. He answered and he answered with vigor. And to my great misfortune, he was firing with a full metal jacket.

Is there a lesson to be learned here? Of course.

If you can't squat with the big dogs, don't get on the pot!

Flatulent Fuzz

Friday, November 21, 2008

Hard Work & Dedication

Our country was founded through hard work and dedication. What happened to those principles? How do the people that lack those principles manage to flourish, while those that value those principles have so little to show for their effort?

These unprincipled free-loaders are standing on the sidelines watching us work and reaping the rewards just the same. Want proof? Look no further than the corporate world. In the corporate world (at least the corporations that I have first hand knowledge of), people that continually under perform are not handed a pink slip. Instead, they are allowed to continue to under perform. All the while, those that have a work ethic are tasked to do more and more. Not only do we take on those extra tasks, but we do so without a word of protest. Am I missing something? Are these slackers bullet proof? Have they cast some kind of spell over us?

For those that might not know, the corporate world functions on the principle of "the bottom line." CEO's and COO' s, vultures that they are, will do anything necessary to pad the bottom line. Isn't that obvious by the number of jobs going to foreign countries? But, the one thing they will not do is fire those that are not pulling their weight. Why? Who has more impact on the bottom line, than those that are doing the grunt work? I can't think of a better way to improve the bottom line, than trimming the fat.

Why won't they can the dead weight? Because, we are a nation of coddlers. How's that, for the bottom line. That's right, we coddle. How many times do we hear about someone that has been arrested, for driving while intoxicated, four or five times? What about someone that is frequently tardy? If there isn't any serious disciplinary action, isn't that a green light to continue to be late. But wait, the coddling epidemic is not confined to the corporate world. Not by a long shot.

How many campaign promises go unfulfilled? How many corporate bailouts will we have to endure? How long will we continue to allow people to abuse the welfare system? Why is there even a welfare system? We coddle the government and they turn around and coddle us right back. They bailout multi-billion dollar corporations and they offer monthly checks to those that are too lazy or lack the will to work. We, vote them in to office and pay their salaries. Occasionally, we pretend to be tired of being disappointed by our representatives. So, we vote for "change that we can believe in." And, the vicious cycle continues and we continue to give our support voluntarily or involuntarily.

Somewhere along the way, we (those that possess a work ethic) have allowed the free loaders to dictate the rules of the game. We're working hard and I'm not sure that we have anything more to show for it. I'm not suggesting that we join the loafers. I don't follow the "if you can't beat them join them" mantra. Even if we can't beat them, I'm not going to join them. However, I don't think we have attempted to defeat them. Perhaps, the evolution was so slow that we failed to realize it was happening until it was too late. Maybe, we have too many responsibilities to really take the time to try and wrap our heads around the magnitude of the problem. Or, have we subconsciously been towing the company line? Which is, of course, coddling.

I'll wager that we have been subconsciously towing the company line. This phenomena didn't happen over night. We have been conditioned, over the years, to accept business as usual. Just like we have been conditioned to accept politics as usual.

Unfortunately, we cannot rely on upper-management or our elected leaders to resolve this problem. Ultimately, it is going to be up to us to start expecting and demanding more out of our fellow Americans. At the local level, corporate level and the federal and state level. If there is ever going to be any accountability, it will have to begin with us.

Friday, November 7, 2008

I'm Back.

I'm back! At least, I think I am. I think that I have been MIA, for almost two months. I really haven't felt inspired to post. But, I think I feel the fires rekindling.

For starters, I'm not sure whether I am amused or in disbelief over people's reaction to President Elect Obama? For the record, I did not support Obama or McCain. In fact, I voted almost 100% Libertarian. But, that's neither here nor there.

What perplexes me, is the naivety of a good portion of the American people. I'm seeing t-shirts that have a picture of Obama, with the words progress below him. On TV, they are saying that we are going to see change. Now, by-and-large, these are celebrities of some form or fashion. I have considered the source. However, I don't believe for one second that they are the only ones that believe that Obama represents change and/or progress. Are people really that naive? Or, do they hold some obscure definition of change and progress? Ladies and gentlemen, I am hear to tell you that the kind of change and progress this country needs is not going to come from a Republican or a Democrat. The sooner we all come to that conclusion, the sooner we can wrestle the country back from elephants and asses.

Obama does seem to have inspired a great number of people. I think that that is fantastic. This is indeed an historical election. However, that is exactly the kind of narrow minded thinking that has led us to the edge. People should look no further than the nearest mirror, if they want to see where the source of real progress and change spawns from. Obama is not the saviour. If we truly want progress and change, we have to be personally responsible for the fate of our nation.

I think it is funny that people laugh, when you tell them that you voted for a third party candidate. They say things like, "why did you even vote" or "they have no chance of winning." On the latter, I say they are absolutely right. As long as the people that are laughing continue to mindlessly support republicans and democrats, a third party candidate isn't going to have a real chance. They should be laughing at themselves, however. How can anyone continue to put their support behind either of the two major parties? I challenge those people to take a look at where our country is at right now. Now, think back to all of the major party senators, representatives and presidents of the past 100 years. They have repeatedly shown that they are not fit to govern. And those that laugh have continued laughing and blindly giving them their support. What if they called a plumber out to do a job for them and the plumber did a crappy job (pardon the pun). Would they turn around and call him back out, whenever they had another plumbing problem? I for one, would not.
Why did I even vote? Because, I firmly believe in showing support to parties that want to govern this country as it was intended to be governed. Let's send the elephants back to the circus and the asses back to the pasture.

Flatulent Fuzz

Friday, September 19, 2008

Open Letter

What I am about to say is directed to all of my fellow Americans. But, particularly to those that hold this country in contempt. The groups and factions that hold a deep seeded belief that they are owed something by this country. Those that seek to change the constitution to suit their own personal interest or lifestyle. And those that exercise their right not to stand or put their hand over their heart during the national anthem. Yet, have absolutely no respect for the very institution that allows them that right.

This country was founded on blood, sweat and tears. The blood, sweat and tears of people of a variety of races and nationalities. Let me say that again. This country was founded on blood, sweat and tears. That is a statement of fact. Stop for a moment and really think about the words blood, sweat and tears. Those terms do not paint a pretty picture. At the same token, some parts of our history do not paint a pretty picture. That is also a statement of fact. Slavery, war, at home and abroad, organized crime, a great depression etc... Those and more, are parts of our collective history that do not paint a flattering picture. However, by way of the blood, sweat and tears and the history contained within it, we were gifted a very solid foundation for governing. But, a solid foundation alone will not sustain us as a nation.

We, as Americans, must come together as "One nation under God.. indivisible with liberty and justice for all." This is also a statement of fact. Our collective history, to this point, has not been perfect. Future generations will be able to look back and make that same claim. Nothing is perfect. And guess what? Nothing is ever going to be. We can no longer afford to be paralyzed by history. We owe it to ourselves and future generations, as well as previous generations, to let go of the baggage of our past. Any number of grievances occurred in the founding of this great nation. We can't afford to sit around waiting for restitution for crimes of the past, whether real or perceived.
Our country, as we know it, is on the verge of extinction. The "American Dream" is almost, if not already, extinct. We are ravaged by division and apathy. We are also ravaged by two dominant political parties who, in the process of tearing each other down, are tearing our nation down. We can no longer afford to be divided. We are never going to agree on absolutely everything. It is imperative, for our survival and the survival of "The American Way," that we put our differences aside and come together and do what is in the best interests of our country collectively.

Flatulent Fuzz

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

A New Day!

Every presidential election cycle, we get the same ole talk about a new day. Or "building a bridge to a new millennium" or" the end of politics as usual." I understand that this is the tried and true way of politics. However, this particular presidential election seems to be the same old sh*t times 100. Perhaps, the insane media coverage makes it seem that way?? The media not withstanding, these two candidates seem to be exactly the opposite of everything that they claim. How can we believe that Obama is the "change" that we can believe in, when he is running his campaign in that tried and true method that I spoke of earlier. I don't think it is a stretch to say that he and McCain are both far exceeding the absurd levels of he said/she said, that we have seen in campaigns of the past. I'm not surprised by the politics as usual. I am surprised, at the whole new level of hypocrisy that these two campaigns are reaching on a daily basis. If one is "change" and the other is a "maverick...." Then I say.... You can keep the change... and the only Mavericks I root for reside in the NBA!!

Flatulent Fuzz

Friday, September 5, 2008

Beautiful Dane

On a much more somber note, I found out over the weekend that my big, beautiful Great Dane has cancer. Those that know me well, know that I love animals. Particularly, my animals. My dog (Molly) and my cat (Nixon) hold a very special place that is near and dear to my heart and I treat them just like family. She has been given roughly three to eight months to live and she is only five years old (about 50, in dog years). While I will enjoy the time that we have left together, I know that there is going to be a tremendous void when she is gone. Since she was a puppy, whenever I come home, she has met me at the door with nothing but shear delight. I look forward to those greetings everyday and even more so now. She has provided me with and endless amount of joy and I will miss her deeply, when she is gone.

Flatulent Fuzz

The End is Nigh...

This just in from the trenches! Little did I know, when I began blogging, about a lack of restroom etiquette, the very depths that this story would plunge. What started, in my view, as merely a lack of respect for the other occupants of the latrine. Has spiraled in to a complete and utter disregard for the common decency and self-respect that God gave a moose.

In my latest restroom chronicles, I have uncovered what can only be described as a shredding of the last bit of moral fiber that was holding us together as a civilized society. At this point, I can't see how things could get any worse. However, I have to admit that, after what I have seen, anything is possible. I'm not really sure how to go about saying this. So, I'll just come right out and say it.

Whilst paying a visit to the thinking man's throne, I observed that fecal matter had been smeared on the side of the stall. Or, at least, what I believe to be fecal matter. I don't believe that it was a Mr. Goodbar, but I'll leave that up to CSI to determine.

Aside from being horrified at the vulgarity of this discovery, I really don't know what to say. While I'll admit to a certain amount of curiosity, as to who the booger culprit is. I don't even want to be in the same building as the person that would smear fecal matter anywhere outside the toilet. In the words of R.E.M... "It's the end of the world as we know it."

Flatulent Fuzz

Saturday, August 23, 2008

$Dollar Menu$

I know some of you are going to view this as heresy, but here goes. Have you ever stopped to consider how a burger can cost a dollar? Or a chicken sandwich or chicken nuggets, for that matter. I realize, of course, that McDonald's, Burger King, Wendy's etc.. buy in bulk. But, we are talking about a meat patty, slice of cheese, lettuce, tomato, onion, pickles and don't forget the bun. "My friends," as John McCain likes to say, you can't hardly get a slice of cheese for a dollar. With that in mind, just what kind of burger or chicken are they serving? So, next time you are at the drive-thru, stop and ask yourself, if you really want a bock for a buck.

Flatulent Fuzz


The United States has a policy (officially anyway) of not assassinating the leaders of foreign nations. Why? I realize, that where government is concerned, there is a lot of politicking and diplomacy. But, how does the willingness to send troops in to combat make more sense than just assassinating the leader of a troublesome nation? Doesn't killing one person make more sense (if killing can make sense) than sacrificing the lives of many?

Flatulent Fuzz

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Restroom Etiquette cont'd...

Restroom etiquette, a topic that knows no bounds. This just in, from the front lines.... better yet, from the Heartland of America. My very own nephew has become an unwitting victim, in what is turning out to be an epidemic in American society. Yes, that band of unkempt Neanderthals has struck again. Not only was said nephew a victim, but he was shat upon by his very own neighbor. Let's call him neighbor X. Neighbor X stopped by, under the auspices of borrowing some movies. Neighbor X has a history of borrowing movies, so there wasn't any real cause for alarm. However, when Neighbor X asked to use the restroom, a cloud of suspicion fell over him. Although leery, my dear nephew decided to grant him access to the coveted throne. Needless to say, when Neighbor X exited the sanctuary, he no longer had a cloud of suspicion cast over him. Neighbor X left the cloud and a whole lot more behind. In essence, he sank my dear nephew's battleship!

To be sure, there is some humour in this. However, I am beginning to believe, that what I once thought was my own paranoia about the social decay of society, is not paranoia at all.

Flatulent Fuzz


Over the past week or so, I have been thinking about a number of different topics. All of which, I hope to make some reasoned comments on over the coming days and weeks. However, one topic above all has catapulted right to the top of my list. Sensationalism in the media. If the media was out of control before and they were. Then, I don't know what they are now. When the likes of The National Enquirer are making the news channel circuit, we are in serious trouble. John Edwards extramarital affair is not and should not be headline news. I'm not a John Edwards defender and I certainly don't defend adultery. But, what John Edwards or anyone other quazi-celebrity does in there private life is not a concern of mine. Now, I expect this kind of coverage from The National Enquirer and Star and magazines of that ilk. However, I think that MSNBC, Fox News, CNN and the other "legitimate" news networks have more pertinent issues to cover, than the extramarital affairs of a former senator, vice-presidential candidate and presidential hopeful.

If they need a news story.. why don't they get behind the Flatulent Fuzz for President hype!

Flatulent Fuzz

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Breaking News!!

Sources close to the Flatulent Fuzz campaign say that the upstart presidential candidate is close to choosing Paris Hilton, as his running mate. The news comes fresh from the release of Hilton's hot new ad touting her energy policy and little else. Fuzz is quoted as saying that "she would positively secure his already firm grip on the moron demographic and boost his numbers among dumb blonde's." Sources say that an announcement could come as soon as tomorrow. Stay tuned!

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Legalize Marijuana?

An article on CNN, about legalizing marijuana use, really got me thinking about that subject. Well really, that got me thinking about alcohol v. marijuana. For the record, I'm not Rick James (b*tch) and I have never been "in love with Mary Jane." However, we did go out a couple of times or more. As for alcohol, I have had my share. In fact, I have had my share and the shares of a couple of other people over the years. Let me also state, that I am not a medical doctor (love doctor, but that is a topic for another post), nor do I have any vast knowledge on chemical dependency. Now that we have all of that out of the way..

My big question here is.... What exactly is the difference between marijuana and alcohol, as far as legalization goes. I haven't yet decided, which side of the legalization argument I fall on. Speaking from personal experience, I'm not sure that I can think of a drastic amount of difference between marijuana and alcohol. They are both mind altering substances. Abuse of either can have negative effects on ones mental and physical well being. Some will argue that marijuana is a gateway drug. I can only speak to that from personal experience. I have never done any other drugs. I am of the opinion, that you are always going to have people that are going to be experimenters. Now, that is not a justification for drug use. What I mean by that is, there are going to be people that will use marijuana and then move on to other "harder" drugs. By that same token, there are going to be people, like Rick James, that fall in love with Mary Jane. I really can't see how marijuana could be considered a gateway drug, but alcohol is not.

There was a time, of course, when alcohol was illegal. Some make the argument that we're wasting money arresting people that are using marijuana recreationally, for lack of a better term. I believe that that was one of the arguments posed, when it came time to legalize alcohol (I'm not 100% certain of that fact). I'm not sure that we can call that a valid argument. The fact is, right now, marijuana use is illegal. If someone is arrested while engaging in an illegal activity, then I can hardly consider that a waste of time.

Flatulent Fuzz

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Restroom Etiquette cont.....

Another entry in the on going saga of Restroom Etiquette....

This just in guys.... When you are "taking care of business," be it at the urinal or in the stall, it should not sound like you are working out. Unless, of course, you are actually lifting weights or something of that nature. Defecation, to be sure, is a time for quiet reflection. Obviously, there may be some snap, crackle or pop, from your instrument. However, there should not and I repeat should not be any grunting, straining or heavy breathing. If you are in the crapper and it sound like you are trying to bench 250, then there is a problem. If you have to make all that noise just to drop a terd, then I recommend you pay a visit to the doctor. Maybe, you should change up your diet. Or, I hear that fiber is a many splendored thing for the digestive tract. Finally, if none of the above works, then find a private toilet and feel free to make all the noise that you like.

Last, but not least.... I would like to address boogers and the bathroom. Gentlemen, and I use the term loosely. How is it that you are sitting on the toilet next to two rolls of toilet paper, but you find it necessary to wipe boogers on the walls of the stall??? God forbid you wipe that big ole green booger on a piece of toilet paper and drop it in the toilet where it belongs. As bad as that is... it gets worse.., if not slightly more humorous. There are boogers ,on the wall in front of the urinals, as well.

I say this with all sincerity and with complete confidence in my heterosexuality... I would pay to have a picture of the Neanderthal that is standing at the urinal, with his Johnson in one hand and a finger on the other hand up his nose. I would send that picture to MasterCard and tell them that that is priceless.

Flatulent Fuzz

Thursday, July 10, 2008

The Rev.

The recent comments made, by Rev. Jesse Jackson, about Barack Obama have gotten my mental gears turning. For those that haven't read or heard the comments.. here's the link

The first thing that came to my mind, when I read those comments, was that that is awfully salty language for a Reverend to be using. Then, I began to wonder, what kind of Reverend uses that kind of language and should a Reverend be using that kind of language. I realize that nobody is perfect, but if a reverend can't hold himself to a higher standard, then who can?? After entertaining those thoughts, I was struck by another question. A much more important question, I think. Should a reverend be entertaining thoughts of physically harming another person? Whether those thoughts be public or private.

Even if he had used a more scientific dialogue to convey his sentiments, the sentiment remains the same.

Ultimately, my concern lies in the fact that a life long reverend would entertain such violent imagery. Do I think that he would actually follow through with those comments? No. Do I think that Reverend Jackson needs to hold himself to a higher standard, in public and in private, and set a better example? Yes.

Flatulent Fuzz

Saturday, July 5, 2008

UFC Tonight!!

Alright UFC fight fan's...... Get out your heavy chains and get ready to see a RAMPAGE!! Don't get me wrong. I like Forrest Griffin, but I think he is barking up the wrong tree tonight. Forrest is a good fighter and he has a ton of heart, but I don' think he is ready for the RAMPAGE. If you haven't had the pleasure of watching Rampage, then you are in for quite a treat. Put some popcorn in the microwave and get in your favorite recliner and get ready for some action. Pay special attention to the stare down, as the referee is explaining the rules... Rampage has one of the most intimidating pre-fight looks, that I have seen. Suffice it to say, I wouldn't want to meet him downtown in broad daylight, let alone in a dark alley. Hey, anything can happen in a fight. But, my gut tells me, there is going to be some howling, when this fight is over.

Flatulent Fuzz

Friday, July 4, 2008

Independence Day!

Happy Independence Day to all....

And dare I say to all, to take a little time out of your day to stop and think about what our independence means to us collectively, as well as individually. Independence is what defines our nation, but it should not be taken for granted. Our independence was gifted to us, through the blood, sweat and tears of our forefathers. In light of that gift, it is incumbent upon each and every one of us, as citizens of the United States, to do our part to preserve our independence. We owe it to our forefathers, as well as ourselves and future generations. So, sometime between enjoying some food and fireworks. take a minute to stop and think what you have done or can do to preserve our greatest gift.

Flatulent Fuzz

Thursday, July 3, 2008

I'm Back...

The vacation is officially over, for the First Family of Flatulents. We drove nearly three thousand miles and while that is a lot of driving, it was well worth it. We visited Memphis, Tn., Chapel Hill, NC and Savannah, Ga. We enjoyed ourselves in each city, but I think Savannah was the city we enjoyed most. Unfortunately, we weren't able to stay as long as we would have liked. The scenery in eastern Tennessee and all over North Carolina was amazing. Savannah was equally as beautiful and had a lot of history to boot. Really, the only let down was coming home. There is no place like home and I can't argue with that, but the scenery at home just doesn't compare.

Flatulent Fuzz

Sunday, June 22, 2008

Road Trip

The first family of Flatulence is taking a road trip. We are currently in Memphis TN, on the second night of our two night stay. Tomorrow, we will be heading up to Franklin TN for a little sight seeing and then will we shoot on over to Chapel Hill NC (big day). Today, we visited Graceland and my only disappointment was that we didn't get to see the bathroom where The King "gave up the ghost." All is well so far. I will try give a daily post from the road. If not daily, then every other day.

Flatulent Fuzz

Thursday, June 19, 2008

To drill or not to drill??

Just a quick thought on this drilling business. I haven't spent a lot of time researching this, so I'm speaking from a somewhat limited base of knowledge. However, from what I have heard and read.. it is going to take quite a bit of oil discovery to give us any relief at the pump. I'll go out on a limb and say that Exxon or whoever isn't going to discover enough oil to make a difference. And I'm sure that I can't be the only one that knows this. That would reasonably mean, that we have another politically motivated push by that joker up there on Pennsylvania Ave. Some might be inclined to call him president or perhaps the leader of the free world.

By no means, do I think that he is the only one that makes politically motivated moves, but to say that this particular move is ABSURD would be a gross understatemnt.

If we expect to get any real relief at the pump, we are going to have to make some serious lifestyle changes. We're going to have to stop buying gas guzzlers and then complaining about the high cost of gas. Hey, I don't have all the answers and I certainly don't claim to. But, I do know that the answer doesn't lie in producing another line of Hummers or H4's.

Enough of all this B.S. about drilling. We need to put some real time and energy in developing transportation that does not rely so heavily on oil.

Friday, June 13, 2008


Our reliance on other countries for our very life blood isn't, or shouldn't be, news to any one's ears. And I'm sure that I'm not that only one that has thought about that reliance and what it means to our country, but it is something that I have been thinking about a lot. I think, most would agree that the United States has been a "great nation." Some might say empire, but I'm going to go with "great nation." By using the term has, I'm not implying that the United States is no longer a great nation. Whether or not it is might be up for debate, but we'll have to have that debate in another post. However, how can any "great nation" survive, when it relies solely upon the products/production of foreign countries? Foreign countries, I might add, that certainly do not have the best interests of the United States in mind. Oil, of course, is one of those products, but clearly that is not the only one. Just take a look at the clothes that you are wearing. If you are wearing anything that was manufactured in these United States, then you are one of the few (congratulations). Add electronics to that list and automobiles and the list goes on and on.

So, not only have we placed our very livelihood in the hands of foreign countries, but we have exported most of our higher paying jobs in the process. We have literally sold ourselves down the river. And I do say WE, because it is WE who have allowed the government to steer this country towards its eminent demise. While we are sitting on the couch hypnotized by Everybody Loves Raymond, the government is ruining this once proud nation. How long can any nation, great or otherwise, last when it has placed all of its eggs in an unstable basket.

Ok... I'll stop ranting, for now. But, my question is... is this the beginning of the end of another empire (great or otherwise)??

Flatulent Fuzz

Friday, June 6, 2008

Gas Prices!

This may be a little late to the party, but the price of gas is getting way beyond out of control. Incredibly, I think that I see more SUV's on the road than ever. As a matter of fact, Mrs. Fuzz has an SUV. Old Flatulent tried and tried to persuade her to buy something more economically reasonable, with gas prices on the rise, but she wouldn't hear of it. But, enough about me.

While I'm no expert on investing, I think now more than ever is an excellent time to invest your money in a motorcycle manufacturing company. That is, if you have any money left after you fill up your car/suv!

Flatulent Fuzz

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Restroom Etiquette?

Perhaps, I am overthinking this. Maybe, I'm just being too sensitive. However, I feel that there is (or at least there should be) an unspoken restroom etiquette. Let's just say that the restroom in question has six stalls. Now, the way I see it, there is no reason for someone to plop down in the stall next to you, if you are the only other person using the stalls. Am I wrong?? At my place of employment, this happens all too frequently. I'm the only one using a stall and there are five other stalls available and low and behold someone will come in and sit down in the stall right next to the one that I occupy. On top of that, they start nuking the thing. It literally sounds like the Fourth of July, except on the fourth you hear the popping sounds without hearing the spraying sounds too.

Come on all of you GORILLAS out there and you know who you are..... Show some common courtesy to your fellow man and use the next stall over, unless all the other stalls are full!!!

Flatulent Fuzz

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Bumper Stickers...

I fully believe that I am going to be in the minority on this, but I must put it out there anyway. I cannot, for the life of me, figure out why it is that people like to place bumper stickers on their vehicles professing their pride in their children's achievements. Why is important that everyone else know that you are proud of your child? In my view, the only person that needs to know that your are proud of your child is your child. Am I wrong?

Flatulent Fuzz

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Marketing Thongs??

Let me start off by saying, that I don't have this article right in front of me, as I left the magazine at work. So, I will check back with the article later and make sure that I haven't inaccurately relayed anything from that article.

I read this in Texas Monthly (May 2008 ed.) and found it quite disturbing.... Abercrombie & Fitch have begun marketing thongs to "tween" girls. For those of you that might not know, a "tween" is prepubescent child between the ages of 8 and 14 years old (some definitions have it between 8 and 12). Now, I don't know about you, but from where I am sitting, I can't think of a single valid reason that a girl between the ages of 8 and 14 would have for wearing a thong. I realize, of course, that for Abercrombie & Fitch the motivation is sheerly money (or the all mighty dollar, as I like to call it). But, when is enough enough? Don't these people have children? I find the very idea of this distasteful and disgusting. Although, I can't say that I am at all surprised. If something has the potential to make a couple of bucks (right or wrong), by golly somebody is going be there to take advantage!

One final thought, I am so, so grateful that I have a two year old BOY!!! To all of you that have "tween" girls... Good luck explaining to them why they can't wear a thong, when Sara Jane from down the street wears them all the time.

Flatulent Fuzz

Saturday, May 10, 2008

Sex Ed

This post is inspired by an article in Texas Monthly (May 2008 ed.). The article is about sex education and the battle over whether or not sex ed. should include information on safe sex and STD prevention (ie.. condom use) or be abstinence only education.

In a perfect world, I think we can all agree that maintaining abstinence until marriage is the best policy. However, I think we can also all agree that this isn't a perfect world, so we are probably better served dealing with the real world. In my view, sex education that only speaks to abstinence is completely unrealistic. Furthermore, I think it could be effectively argued that it isn't sex education at all. If I tell my son, "Hey, don't have sex until you are married," where is the education in that?

Am I going to encourage my son to abstain from sex until he is married? ABSOLUTELY! But, I'm not foolish enough to believe that temptation might not get the better of him, at some point in his adolescent life. So, while I am going to encourage him to abstain from sex, I am also going to educate him about practicing safe sex. And this may come as a shock to some people, but we shouldn't be leaving the education of our children (sexual or otherwise) solely up to the schools anyway. You and you alone are responsible for what your child does or does not learn.

Friday, May 9, 2008


As you can probably tell, the site is under construction. In the coming days, I hope to add many more features. Once I have everything setup how I would like, it will be my goal to leave posts daily. In the mean time, I will be posting as often as possible.


Flatulent Fuzz

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